Episode 356: The Soul Contract vs. the Achievement Wound — Three Questions to Ask Before You Quit

Soul Contract or Pushing Water Uphill? How to Know Before You Quit

I’ve been a business coach for over 17 years, and here’s what I know. If you’re out in the world doing anything worth doing, you’ll eventually hit a certain moment. Maybe a launch goes quiet, or a client is upset with you. Or you open your bank account, and the number isn’t the one you wanted. Then the thought shows up: Who did I think I was? Should I just quit? In this episode, I walk you through how to tell whether you’re pushing water uphill or whether your soul contract is asking you to get bigger.

Your soul contract is the thing you’re here to deliver, whether anyone claps or not. The achievement wound, on the other hand, is the part of you that keeps waiting for applause from the outside. To show you the difference, I’m using a moment Taylor Swift shared in her documentary. It was filmed after her Reputation album was critically shunned, and you can see the grief on her face. Even so, she doesn’t ask whether she should quit. Instead, she decides to make a better record.

So if you’re standing at your own crossroads right now, girlfriend, this one’s for you. Pop in your earphones, and let’s get to it.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• The two ways this moment can go sideways: caving, or clenching and white-knuckling a process that isn’t working
• Why someone else’s “how” not working for you says nothing about your “what”
• A simple way to tell your soul contract apart from a hobby you love
• How the achievement wound and the soul contract ask completely different questions
• Three questions to ask yourself before you decide to quit
• What happened the day I had to tell myself, “Sarah, there’s no money in wallowing”
• A journal prompt to help you see what’s truly yours to deliver

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The Moment That Tests Your Soul Contract

About eight years ago, Taylor Swift sat on her couch in a matching pink sweatsuit, on the phone with her publicist. They were waiting for the Grammy nominations to come out. In fact, she was so nervous that she’d been unpacking boxes and moving furniture just to distract herself. Then the news came in, and it wasn’t what she’d hoped for.

You watch it hit her. She’s shaken, and she’s sad. Yet within seconds, she says she’s fine and that she’ll just have to make a better record. When her publicist tells her that was a great record, she agrees and adds that she needs to make a better one.

Chances are, you’ve had your own version of that phone call. Maybe it was a bank balance, an upset client, or a really quiet inbox after you sent out emails. Then comes that weird pause where you wonder whether it’s time to quit. Or is this your soul contract, and it’s time to double down? By the way, if you haven’t had this moment yet, I might encourage you to do something a little more risky with your life. After all, you don’t get a do-over. This is your one and only life.

“Grief doesn’t mean you cave. You don’t have to cave when it gets hard. You don’t have to cave when you’re sad.” — Sarah Walton

Instead of asking, “Should I quit?” she asked herself what the next rep was. In other words, what’s the one next step? That is where all the money is, you guys. It’s also where courage comes into play. We practice that courage every time we do the hard thing, say the hard thing, or stop saying yes when we mean no.

Two Ways to Abandon Your Soul Contract (Without Meaning To)

First, you can cave. Let’s be honest, you kind of want to, because it hurts to be rejected. So you can abandon the divine assignment you’re here to do simply because it hurts. A lot of people do, and we see it all the time.

Second, you can clench. This is the “I will win” energy, the “stay hungry” message we’ve all heard. It’s very patriarchal, and it looks like white-knuckling a process that isn’t working. However, you don’t have to keep fighting when something truly isn’t working. That doesn’t mean your vision is wrong. More often, you’re holding on to a “how” that doesn’t fit.

I see this all the time in online business, where people promise that everything will work if you follow their three-step process.

“That’s somebody else’s how. And because their how doesn’t work for you, that has nothing to do with your what.” — Sarah Walton

Of course, we know now what came after that moment on the couch, including the Eras Tour. In that moment, however, she didn’t know any of it. What she did know was that the “what” was correct, and the “how” had to shift. That’s why, even after a record she believed was great, she decided to make an even better one.

How to Know If It’s Your Soul Contract

As women who are out to make a difference, we’re going to run into these moments more and more. So I want to support you in choosing your soul contract. Don’t choose the ego, and don’t choose the achievement wound that keeps waiting for everybody else to clap.

“How do you actually know what a soul contract is? It’s the thing that you would do even if no one else knew about it.” — Sarah Walton

That said, not everything you love is your soul contract. For example, I could spend all day decorating, and I don’t think that’s mine. Honestly, I think that’s a hobby. Your soul contract usually means expanding yourself and then being the example of how other people can expand too. Some women live it as actors who change lives with the way they deliver a line. Others live it through their art. If you want more on this, I’ve also written about how to find yours here.

Whatever it looks like for you, it’s about coming inside instead of looking outside of yourself. We’re here to create something, offer something, and move humanity forward. And when I say “humanity,” that can mean 10 people.

“The collective unconscious gets lifted up every single time one of us hits our soul contract and starts showing up.” — Sarah Walton

Now think about the joy Taylor Swift brings to the people who love her music. That joy is consciousness, and it’s life. Plus, she didn’t give up on it, because she didn’t care what other people said.

Sometimes your soul contract shifts a little, and the how changes along with it. When that happens, it’s a nudge from the universe to revisit the how and to expand yourself. That’s exactly why I work inside of wealth consciousness and teach women to increase their capacity for more. After all, when your soul contract expands, you have to be big enough to hold it. That also means dealing with your achievement wounds. In addition, it means noticing the times you care more about what other people think than about your own heart.

[H2] The Achievement Wound vs. the Soul Contract

At first, “I’ve just got to make a better record” can sound like the achievement wound. That wound is about wanting outward accolades. It’s always asking, Do you see me now? Is this enough now? Am I good enough now?

Here’s the difference, and I want you to get really good at spotting it. The achievement wound asks, “What do I have to do to earn the praise?” If she’d followed it, she would have gone on an outward search: They don’t like me. How do I make them like me? Who can I take to lunch? But that’s not what she did.

“The soul contract asks, what is mine to deliver? And it is a completely internal conversation.” — Sarah Walton

Notice that she didn’t wait for her publicist to agree with her. In fact, her publicist tried to talk her out of it. She declared it anyway, because that was an internal switch.

Now, I’m using an example of someone we all know because she’s still just a person. No job lifts us out of our humanity. We all still want people to like us, and we all wonder whether we’re doing it right. Also, the point isn’t that she had wins later. Rather, in that moment, she knew what was hers to deliver, and she doubled down on it. Her message wasn’t “Watch, and then you’ll see I’m worthy.” Instead, it was “Watch me deliver what I’m here to deliver.”

Three Soul Contract Questions to Ask Before You Quit

Whenever you’re in this moment, ask yourself these three questions before you take your next action. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a scary bank balance or a bombed launch.

1. Is it the work you love, or the applause?

One great way to get to the truth here is to ask yourself, “Would I continue to do this if no one clapped?”

2. Is this grief or dread?

What Taylor Swift felt on that couch was grief. She had poured her heart and soul into that album while people were saying horrible things about her. Then it was critically shunned. Grief like that can point you right back to your soul contract. It hurts because you know you’re here to do this, and you haven’t found your how yet. Dread, on the other hand, points outside of you. What are they going to say? How are they going to respond?

“Grief is a real thing. Dread is when you’re waiting for other people to tell you you’re good enough.” — Sarah Walton

3. What’s the next step?

If you trust your soul contract, you’ll know the next move to make. At first, that may sound contradictory, so sit with it for a minute. This step is about “I,” not “they.” In other words, it isn’t “I’ll do this so they’ll do that.” Rather, it’s “I’m going to flex this skill right now, for me.”

My Own “Should I Just Stop?” Moment

Recently, I planned something for my family, and it went sideways. Unfortunately, that spilled over into work. Because I was preoccupied, I flubbed an important message I was getting out that day. By the next morning, I was really upset, and part of me wanted to just let it go and stop.

But I work in wealth consciousness, and I’ve been a business coach for over 17 years. So I had to talk to myself plainly.

“There’s no money in wallowing. That’s not going to change anything.” — Sarah Walton

After all, that’s not how we run businesses, and it’s not how we handle family events that go sideways. We get up, and we take the next step. So that’s what I did. As it turned out, everything in the business went better than I thought it would. On top of that, the family situation got handled really quickly.

“When we flip internally, when we get the difference between pushing water uphill to force versus living the soul contract out of truth, everything starts to shift.” — Sarah Walton

Once you sign on for your soul contract and start trusting it, other people’s opinions don’t hit you the same way. That’s because you’re on divine assignment, and you’re honoring it. Honestly, it’s so much more fun living on this side of that decision.

A Soul Contract Journal Prompt for When You Want to Quit

If you want to take this one step further, pull out your journal and spend a few minutes with this question:

“If no one ever gave me the award, would I still be here to deliver?” — Sarah Walton

Then just write and see what starts to come out.

Resources Mentioned

• The 54-second clip from Taylor Swift’s documentary here
• Want to go further? Read more about the soul contract here

Related Episodes You’ll Love

Episode 352: The Achievement Wound — Why Success Never Feels Like Enough — In this solo episode, I name the achievement wound, share where it starts, and walk through the signs high-achieving women miss. It’s a natural follow-up, since the achievement wound is what keeps us waiting for applause. Listen here

Episode 300: 300 Episodes and Counting: Why Your Dreams in Progress Matter More Than Perfect Timing — After 300 episodes, I share why consistency beats perfectionism. I also talk about how to keep going when you want to quit on your dream. Listen here

Episode 346: Certainty Is a Skill (And You Can Learn It) — Certainty and confidence aren’t the same thing. In this one, I explain how to build certainty in your business before you have proof. That’s why it pairs so well with trusting what’s yours to deliver. Listen here

Ready to Keep Expanding? Join the Abundance Academy

If you love this type of work and you’re ready to keep expanding, come join us inside the Abundance Academy. It’s 12 months of living inside of wealth consciousness. Along the way, you’ll have me in your ear, plus a community of women on divine assignment who cheer each other on as they work through their soul contracts. I created it so you can become the woman who knows what her contract is and isn’t afraid to step into it. Also, I read every single application personally, and I can’t wait to read yours.

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Let’s Talk About Your Business

Maybe you’re at your own “should I quit or double down?” moment right now. If so, let’s talk. As my gift to Girlfriends, I offer a free 30-minute discovery call. Together, we’ll look at where you are right now and what might be getting in the way.

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Connect with Sarah

• Instagram: @thesarahwalton
• LinkedIn: Sarah Walton
• Free resources for you
• Join the Game On Girlfriend® community — subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube

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Love This Episode?

If you know a woman who’s wondering whether to quit or double down, send this episode her way. The three questions might be exactly what she needs before she makes her next move.

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About Sarah Walton

Sarah Walton is a wealth consciousness coach, strategic advisor, and the host of the Game On Girlfriend® podcast. Her mission is simple: to put more money in the hands of more women. She helps women entrepreneurs build profitable, sustainable businesses without burnout — working through both the mindset and the strategy sides of growth. Because when women have more financial power, they don’t just keep it — they use it to take care of their families, support their communities, and build something bigger than themselves. Through her programs — including the Abundance Academy and The Art of Receiving — along with her online courses and one-on-one coaching, Sarah works with women who are ready to build profitable businesses and use that financial power to make a real difference in the world around them.