Episode 274: Power of Pause: Why Your Brain Cannot Solve the Problem With Wendy Paige Sterling

By Sarah Walton | April 1, 2025

Click here to watch the video version of this podcast episode at 3pm

There is a misconception that pausing means ceasing any and all activity, that you are lazy, or that you are incapable. Ironically, the acceleration happens during the pause.

Are you up against a problem that you've had more than once? Maybe you're starting to notice this is a pattern; something's happening where you're constantly uncomfortable, things don't feel right, or you are exhausted. The truth is, your brain is not going to solve that problem for you.

How do you deal with this? Today's podcast guest Wendy Paige Sterling has the answer. She helps us tap into the power of the pause and walks us through how to move forward when we're feeling our most stuck.

Wendy is a bold Leadership Disruptor empowering high-achieving women to break industry norms by tapping into their intuitive "Yes I Can" voice to create movements and drive impact with a mission to align business with passion.

Wendy's really known for this no-nonsense approach—you'll hear it in the way that she speaks, but it is so inviting and accessible.

Take a pause to reset

Wendy says her work is a calling. From a young age, she had the innate ability to be OK with how different she was – but that feeling got silenced. She was the granddaughter of Holocaust survivors on two sides of her family. So, when her grandparents moved to the U.S., it was all about fitting in with the American dream.

"I was not born to fit into anybody's mold or role," says Wendy. "I needed to finally stand up for myself to stop playing small, to stop feeling lost on a daily basis and seeking external validation, to stop feeling suffocated by the weight of other people's expectations."

She says at the end of the day, her fire within was all about helping other women turn on their lights inside. Taking a pause and listening to their intuition would help guide them.

"It's really about resetting your fuse so that you can ignite the fire within you to start living that dream, but ultimately, it's got to come in these moments of pause where we give ourselves that ability to not only breathe but to fully exhale," says Wendy.

Those deep exhale moments can come with fear and doubt, but for Wendy, they mean choosing yourself and your authentic being.

Power of pause

We all have the power to pause. But Wendy says women juggling multiple balls—that they might see as accolades—feel the pressure to keep going; they can't put them down.

She hates hustle culture and the idea of powering through. It only gives you a false sense of momentum because all you are doing is doing. But you're not present or connected; there is no intention or focus.

"You think your focus is on the outcome, but you are completely ignoring everything in between," says Wendy. "And what the pause gifts you is the in-between, which then attaches the outcome that much faster."

She says the pause silences your mind. It's in your mind that fear, doubt, regret, judgment, and ego live. It's loud and distracting. Wendy says she's not the type to meditate. Her pauses come on walks with the dog or even in the shower—they're places where you can hear your intuitive thoughts and inner wisdom.

"It is that conscious calm that will come in those pause moments to really enable you to know what is best and to get you where it is that you want to go that much faster," says Wendy.

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Get curious to get unstuck

If you're feeling stuck, Wendy says leaning into the moment is important. We tend to seek shortcuts to get as much done as possible, but the real shortcut is allowing yourself to move through what is coming up.

Get curious about the emotions that are attached to your to-do list. You might be making something a bigger deal than it really is, or you might realize you need to re-prioritize another task.

"[Leaning in] is going to help to settle you, like to really ground you into that moment for you to also bring down like your nervous system," says Wendy. "When you're acting in that high agitated state, that reactive state, you're not making the best decisions or choices."

Asking yourself why you are putting other people's feelings ahead of your own and setting boundaries will help you focus on what you can control.

Ego versus intuition

When you're curious, it's essential to recognize the difference between your ego attacking you and your intuition.

It will require you to slow down and pay attention to how a thought is making you feel and the sensations that are coming up in your body.

Fear is going to come in, and it's going to cause a massive amount of reactivity and anxiety. It is going to make your heart race, and then it will set your mind on overdrive, reaching for evidence and logic to prove that it is the right thing to do.

Intuition is calm and easy but firm, "Hey there." It will have no logic attached to it. It will be something that you've never even thought of—it will not have any emotion attached to it.

"So when your mind is driving the bus, it is not the right answer for you. But when your body gets curious, and it feels very calm, then that's the direction you can flow," says Wendy.

Because listening to the noise isn't serving you, Wendy says we tend to downplay the ripple effect. Everybody in your universe feels that frequency if you're operating on fear. It's contagious. You can be more conscious about the energy you're putting out there.

"This is why it's so important for us to slow down, to engage in more moments of pause so that we are feeling in deeper alignment, not only with ourselves but with the people that we want to bring into our life," says Wendy. "Or that the people that are in our life, how we want them to feel when they are with us."

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